October 7th, 2010 - Internal Conversations and Debates

Sorry for the lack of update, it has been a little crazy.  The last few days have been nothing more than work, eating a few meals, and getting a few hours of sleep.  One night was only 2 ½ hours of broken sleep.  With that amount of rest, things start to blur together and you play catch up for a few days.  Little things that you have always taken for granted start to lose some importance as time moves forward.  

Last night I had a little discourse in my mind, which had to be due to the setting in sleep deprivation.  At home brushing your teeth is something that doesn’t take a lot of energy or effort.  You get ready for bed and walk the 10 feet the bathroom and spend a few minutes brushing and flossing.  Last night, at the end of a long day I took off my boots and uniform and had a mental discussion about whether I should put on my shoulder holster and walk the 100 meters to the latrine to brush my teeth.  

I’m not talking about a split second mental moment but a full blown discussion with myself in my mind on whether I should just go to sleep or go brush my teeth.  I’m not sure how long I sat in a tired heap at the edge of my bed thinking about this little decision but it had to be more than five minutes.  I started to think of ways that I could speed up this ‘ordeal’ of brushing my teeth.   

Should I break the rules and brush my teeth outside with bottled water?  Should I just wait for the inevitable urgent trip to the bathroom in the middle of the night and brush my teeth then?  Should I spend 10 minutes looking through all my bags for the little Oral-B disposable toothbrushes, just use them, and avoid the walk to the latrine?  Should I just go to take a shower at night instead of the morning and brush my teeth after my shower?  Should I just skip brushing my teeth all together?  Should I just suck it up and put on my holster, pistol, socks, shoes, and flashlight and go brush them?  

Finally, common sense and the image of my wife looking at me disgustedly and telling me that I was gross for not brushing my teeth won the debate.  I forced my body up, put on my stuff, and walked to the latrine where I spent a few minutes getting ready for bed.  Altogether, I know that I spent more time on this internal struggle than the time that it actually took for the brushing, but at the time, this debate seemed like the single most logical thing in the whole wide world.